My Past Memories
Early childhood experiences have both a positive and negative impacts on the lives young people as they grow up to become adults. Children who are brought up in the absence of one or both parents are likely to become deviants because of the psychological effects as a result of the pain that they are subjected to. Children from such families are likely to engage in social crimes like robbery, abortion, murder, rape, drugs abuse, sexual immorality, teenage pregnancies and early marriages during their teenage years. Foundations that parents lay in the life of their children go a long way to making them responsible adults because it is during childhood that people learn to love, care and be considerate of others, respect people and other’s property, and learn how to take responsibilities and societal values. I chose this story because of the increasing rate of children who are brought up by single parents due to broken families. This essay demonstrates how broken families affect the growth of children based on my childhood experience.
It started in 2006 when my parents divorced, for the first six years of my life, I had both parents who loved and cared for me. I remember during meals, they were there to watch me eat my food. When I started going to kindergarten, my mother would prepare me for school, pick me up after school, bathe me and help me with my homework. Dad was usually good at telling stories and cracking jokes. He made our evenings because he filled them with laughter and joy and together with my three siblings we lived appreciating the fun of childhood.
One time we went to Australia together to visit our cousin and I did not realize this would be the last trip we would have as a family. Shortly afterwards in the September 2006 my parents divorced. I had not noticed that they had been having struggles in their marriage since they maintained brave faces in our presence. I now realize that a lot was happening behind the scenes that led to their divorce. My parents’ divorce was a totally new experience for me because I was used to seeing both of my parents every day. Now I could only see my mother over weekends. I live with my father and my step mother who love her child more than me and this had major psychological impacts to my life.
My parents’ divorce triggered anger, hatred and resentment in me which have never left me. I keep imagining what a beautiful family we would be having if my parents never divorced. I visit them and we chat but I still have not forgiven them for their interference with my life through their divorce. I blame them for my failures and hope we went back to the beautiful family we had in my childhood. My father and mother’s relationship is also not good anymore because my father keeps blaming my mother for the divorce. However, bygones are bygones and as it is, they have both moved on with their life.
As much as the divorce was not a good experience, I can attribute it to some positive things in my life. I have learnt to be more independent and care for myself better due to my parent’s divorce. I learnt to make personal decisions very early in life and thus making me to be independent. In fact, one of the decisions I made was that I would work very hard at school and pray that my own family would be more stable than my parents’ was. Thanks to my father who is very responsible, I have made it this far in my studies. It was hard for me to accept new members in my family such as my step parents and siblings, but we have fun sometimes and I have learnt to enjoy the moments we share together. It may not be the perfect family, but I have learnt to appreciate every little blessing that I receive in life.
Broken families interfere with the healthy and normal growth of children as it is evident from my own experience; children possess anger, resentment and hatred for their parents. The divorce forced me to cope with step mothers, fathers and step siblings. I have grown up to hate my step-mother because of my past experiences. Sometimes this is very hard since the new family members may not like them. Broken families are on the increase and thus making children become devastated. They are emotionally distressed and some even opt to run away from their homes. However, children in broken families are taught how to be independent, make their own decisions and stand up for themselves early in life. They become more responsible and independent as they grow up to become adults because of the life experiences that teach them how to be independent. This story matter to me because the divorce of my parents has made me to be more strong and independent. I am telling this story so as to act as an inspiration to other children who are in broken families and think that they cannot make it in life.